Presence Matters

February 11, 2012

Winter descends upon us,
Howling all the way,
Cold wind and snow showers,
Bundled and feeling the weather
Hugging the wind and cold.

Loving what is,
Feeling safe inside,
Warm and dry
Loving what is.

February 10, 2012

Today is Dr. John Upledger’s 80th birthday – and I want to thank him for mentoring me for so many years and teaching me most of what I know about dialoguing with the human body – my own and those of all my clients. He has immeasurably expanded my perceptual lens around what we are capable of in terms of physical, emotional and spiritual healing.

So I want to take this day, his birthday, to thank him for all that he has done for not only me, but for the hundreds of thousands of therapists and healthcare practitioners he has inspired since 1985 when the Upledger Institute was created.

Thank you Dr. John – may your day be the best possible!

February 9,2012

As we try to pretend it is winter here in the DC area – where no appreciable winter weather has happened yet – I am reminded that this is the time of year in Chinese medicine for rebuilding reserves – the season of the element of water, which relates closely to our skeletal system, our bones. We are meant to slow down, look inward and rest more as our nights are longer and days shorter than in the summer. And so, every year at this time I vow to rest more. Some years are better than others (translation: some years I have done really poorly at this!)

So one practice that is really helpful at this time of year is to take the time  to slow down and sink into your bones – relaxing back into the deep recesses of who you are. I am in the process of recording a new exploration on this topic and it should be available  as an MP3 download within the next few weeks. It has been tremendously helpful for me as I have developed it. I hope you find it as delicious and nourishing. I will let all of you know when it is available.

February 8, 2012

Yesterday, in the Health and Science section of the Washington Post  there was an article about how researchers are discovering that Humpback whales in the same ocean (albeit separate sides of it) actually make distinctly different sounds.  Like different complex languages. Some overlap, but distinctly different sounds. Who would have thought this possible?

January 3rd, I watched a CBS special on African forest elephants and a woman, Andrea Turkalo, who has been recording them for 20 years. And surprise, surprise, they too have a very complex language and style of communication. Right down to how they grieved as a community when a young elephant died. Each and every one of the community filed past the body of the young elephant and expressed emotion as they passed; each of them in their own unique way – with their individual voices.

So what this says to us, as a culture, is that our fellow beings on this planet – mammals and others – are similar to us in some remarkable ways. In western culture we have tended to think that we, as human beings, are the “end all – be all” and that everyone else that we are sharing the planet with are only here for our use and pleasure. And, it is easier to take advantage of other people and other animals if we see them as less than ourselves, different than ourselves, and basically not at all like us.

And yet, this assumption is being eroded day by day now. It is fascinating to watch specials on animals, indigenous people, and basically many of those we considered “the other – not like us at all” being shown to be much more like us than we knew. And so the walls are coming down. This is a good thing. It enables us to expand our perceptual lens so that we can connect more deeply with all of life. Bigotry is built on seeing those different than us as “the other.” And hopefully, it cannot survive the growing reality of how deeply we are connected and similar we actually are.

February 7, 2012

Below is a quote from the film Iron Lady, sent to me by a colleague this week. It really got me thinking about how unconsciously many of us ramble through our days – never really recognizing the impact that our thoughts can have upon who we are, and how we experience life. It relates nicely to our Principle Four: Expand Your Perceptual Lens. Read on below and let me know what you think!

Spoken by Margaret Thatcher:

“Watch your thoughts for they become words. Watch your words for they become actions. Watch your actions for they become…habits. Watch your habits, for they become your character. And watch your character, for it becomes your destiny! What we think we become. “

February 6, 2012

After a great weekend of co-leading Skills to Energize Your Life, today was a day of rejuvenation for me. I managed to stay in my bathrobe until almost noon. This afternoon I got out into the glorious sunny weather. I walked and walked and walked. Breathed deeply. Watched the great grey heron fly and listened to the birds all the way around the lake. Movement of this nature always feeds me. Clear sunlight feeds me. Being by the water feeds me. The breeze was gentle, and I could not have been happier.

Hoping your day had at least one nurturing resource you were able to tap into. And, enjoy!

February 4, 2012

Today, in Skills to Energize Your Life, we had a wonderful circle of rejuvenation. I am always in awe of how powerful the energy field can be when a group of like minded, committed people gather for learning and growth with kindness and compassion as their guide. It was a day of filling up and getting to know our inner landscapes in a more refined way. I am looking forward to tomorrow.

If you were unable to make it to this workshop there are several others this spring and summer – take a look here for more locations and dates!

February 3, 2012

I am excited to be bringing another Skills To Energize Your Life workshop here to Reston,Virginia this weekend. As life gets fuller and fuller and asks more and more of us with less and less time to do it all, it is a welcome relief to come to this workshop this weekend.

We all need time to rejuvenate. It is not selfish – it is a necessary, vital part of staying healthy and being able to continue to give back in our communities, in our work lives and in our families. When we have regular practices that give back to us – helping us “refill the tank” – hopefully before it is on red – we have more to share from.

When I first started teaching this work over two decades ago, people were hesitant to take time for self-care. However, I see that changing rapidly. More blogs are talking about it. More discussions where people are finding themselves less judgmental about the self-care process.

The other exciting thing about self-care the research that is emerging about how our lives benefit from it so much – and I am talking everywhere – work life, home life, intimate other life. This means that we think much more clearly, are far more creative, kind and compassionate, and able to receive and give love when our tanks are full.

The key here is practice – a once a year vacation is important. Having daily practices that feed and refuel you is even more important. I will blog more about that tomorrow after our first day of rejuvenating together and learning skills to build these healthy nurturing habits. Enjoy!

January 2, 2012

Several friends sent me this video this week. I found it very powerful and I thought you all might as well. Here is the link. Enjoy!

February 1, 2012

When I get stuck on an issue and cannot seem to resolve a given problem, I have learned to step back and look again at the questions or assumptions I am operating from in that moment. Often the answer to a problem eludes me because I am not asking the correct question(s).

Years ago when we were remodeling our home, I asked a good friend for his opinion about a given contractor. My friend told me he was great to work with and that he was like having a Buddha in the house running the project. That sounded great to me – doesn’t it sound great to you? And off we went, having a wonderful time with him running the entire project. He indeed was even tempered and calm, and a wonderful man. He also had never handled a project that size and the over runs were massive – really huge. I was waking up at night with anxiety trying figure out how we were going to pay for it all. We were hemorrhaging money. I finally had to step in, stop payment on some things and finish it up the best way we could. It was not pretty.

In looking back I had to ask myself,  how did we get there? By not asking the right questions. Years later I was talking to the friend who had originally recommended the contractor. When I asked the right questions he readily admitted that the contractor had trouble with the financial end of his projects and that he had run over on their project as well. I was stunned. “Why,” I asked him, “didn’t you tell me that?” “You didn’t ask me about that part. I told you he was a great guy to work with day to day – which he was. Far better than any contractor we had ever dealt with before. I thought that was what you wanted to know.”

The issue of knowing what questions to ask in any given situation continues to fascinate me.

When I am in session, dialoguing with someone’s body about a problem they are having, it never fails to amaze me how the body can and will heal, if asked the right questions in an open-ended, respectful way. It’s all in the questions and the neutral, caring delivery.

One of the gifts that Dr. John Upledger gave me (and all of us) years ago was a deep appreciation for the healing capacity of the human system. And, watching him dialogue with the inner wisdom of the person on his treatment table taught me so much about questions. Such as, which question would open this person’s system to healing and which questions would shut the whole process down? I marveled at his technical understanding of anatomy and physiology which enabled him to ask the most intricate questions when someone’s system had gone awry.

In all things questions are important. I have become a life-long student of questioning  - continuing to ask them until I get to the bottom of something, and not making assumptions about what someone means by a word or a phrase. In conversation I will often ask for clarification so that I am not getting stuck in an assumption (theirs or mine!) It yields some wonderful benefits at times. I am able to help others uncover and debunk their unconscious assumptions, if they are not true. I am able to free up my own thinking as I continue to go down through the layers of what I am assuming.

So my question is, what assumptions are you operating from that need a new question asked, so that you can think outside the box and perhaps move beyond your current limitations?