Feb 11 2008
Presence and Emotional Healing
I recently spent the day with 14 therapists – a mix of massage therapists, occupational therapists and physical therapists. We were refining skills they had learned in a SomatoEmotional Release (SER) workshop.
That day I realized something that’s true for all of us who put our hands on people therapeutically, no matter what the modality. Even in the SER dialoguing process – a clearly structured verbal process – your therapeutic presence is a key factor.
As someone who has worked to enhance my therapeutic presence for years, I tend to take this for granted. But for this group I purposely brought it from the background into my conscious awareness. And I had some startling revelations.
When I have my hand on someone’s troubled heart, my hand registers the tension in the tissues – the tightness, the burning sensation. Yet when I am at home in the rest of my body, really present and grounded, then my body becomes a finely tuned navigational system that registers what’s going on in my client’s ribs, belly, spine, what have you – even though my hands aren’t on those body parts.
So there’s an intimate partnership between what my hands are feeling and what the rest of my navigational system is reading about another person’s healing process. Yet as bodyworkers, we usually focus on what our hands are receiving, and we ignore the rest of ourselves in the equation.
Yes, if we’re skilled we pay attention to body dynamics, proper table height and the like. But I’m speaking to a much deeper level of who we can be as therapists if we have the skills to use all of ourselves in the treatment room – the skills of holding a strong therapeutic presence. See Healing From the Core: Grounding and Healthy Boundaries courses.
To do this we must cultivate a wider field of focus; one that includes all of ourselves and the rest of the universe. But let’s just start with the rest of the room: the ground beneath your feet, the air you’re breathing. Self-care practices that help you hold a wider, steadier presence are of the utmost importance here. When you feel nourished and energetically full, this wider perspective is much easier to achieve.
Another thought also struck me. By being grounded and steady, it’s far easier for me to receive whatever information is coming through my intuitive channels (what we call the non-conscious in SER) without being upset by it.
Let’s face it, the images that come into our awareness during a therapeutic session can be surprising at times. Life happens, and it can sometimes show up on the treatment table. But when I’m grounded and steady, what’s troubling to the heart under my hands that day may touch me, but it won’t bring me down. Instead I can simply hold space for my client to heal – to help her heart soften and widen, her chest fill and her body relax.
So tell me, how do you connect with your clients in a way that enables you to receive this much data without having to walk away with their emotional baggage – their “stuff”? And how do you keep your own issues from polluting your clients’ systems if you’re having a bad day/week/month/life?
I’d love to hear from you.
Some of my clients are afraid that some demonic force is telling me what is wrong with them. My answer is that my cerabellum automaticly tracks and adjusts my body and so dose yours. The problem is that with life’s injuries some of the comunication gets interupted. The scriptural principle is that “Through use ones perceptive powers are trained to destinguish both what is right and what is wrong.” My cerabellum therfore accepts reports that have not reached yours and with proper contact with reflex points proper comunication can often be restored.
Acting as a comunication chanel rather than becoming a caretaker helps me avoid taking on their problem. I endevor to build the clients capacity to care for themselves with each visit. This weekend I complemented a client on hw well she was holding her posture. She reflected for a moment and remarked that it has been two months since she las called for my health. No loss for me; she refes some one to me about every six weeks.
Hans Albert Quistorff, LMP
Antalgic Posture Pain Specialist
I was struck by your article this issue! It came as an underline to my own wakening awareness that my therapeutic presence was not as clean as it used to be with a few clients that I see weekly and that are not making much progress. These few individuals have verbalized they do not want to “tackle the issues” so much as get through the week in less pain. Because of this, I’ve allowed what you so aptly call “the rest of my navigational system” to drift. So thank you for helping me remember it’s about MY presence, no matter what the client’s choice, my professionalism and compassion for all situations. I need to be fully present, even if the client chooses not.
One way I tap into the rest of my navigational system to read another person’s situation is through a wave pattern I generate by rocking the client’s soft tissue around the bones. When I get the “wave” tuned to that area’s frequency I get information about where things are stuck, and I also feel them relax more deeply. I learned this from a wonderful MT who is a master. I still have plenty to learn in this area.
But most specifically to answer your last question, about receiving the client’s emotional baggage without taking it on, I draw on my reiki training. With reiki, you are the channel of the universal life energy, not the source of healing. It works both ways, and I pass on what I receive to the universe to take care of things. When it is particularly intense, I may affirm silently that “I offer the energy to its next highest level, for the highest good of [client name].” The universe’s capacity is infinite – for both love and healing.
When my emotional stuff is in the way, I use pelvic floor exercies to relax. A phrase from Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way is a big help: In any single moment we are safe and OK. It is okay to relax and be serene in this moment, and then the next, and the next. The time to address my stuff is after 60 of those moments
Thanks again for your wonderful column.
Suzanne-
I feel it’s important to stay in the ‘now’. “Now” I am a therapist doing my job so I don’t have time to reflect on my own problems. They have no place in the room. “Now” I am concentrating on my client, what’s wrong and how I can help. (My clients often say ‘how did you know where to go? You hit all the sore spots and now they’re ok.’)
Years ago I learned a technique of imaging stepping into a bubble that protected me but also let me reach out to do my work.
Now I think of myself as a ‘hollow bone’ who is channeling good energy, healing energy into the client and drawing bad energy out. Once it’s out it dissipates into the air. (I have had times when that’s all it took–Just drawing the bad energy, or pain, out–not doing any muscle work at all!)
I’m sure everyone comes to some technique that feels right for them but for those who may not have gotten there yet, I hope these ideas we’re all writing down will help.