Presence Matters

I recently spent the day with 14 therapists - a mix of massage therapists, occupational therapists and physical therapists. We were refining skills they had learned in a SomatoEmotional Release (SER) workshop.

That day I realized something that’s true for all of us who put our hands on people therapeutically, no matter what the modality. Even in the SER dialoguing process – a clearly structured verbal process – your therapeutic presence is a key factor.  

As someone who has worked to enhance my therapeutic presence for years, I tend to take this for granted. But for this group I purposely brought it from the background into my conscious awareness. And I had some startling revelations. 

When I have my hand on someone’s troubled heart, my hand registers the tension in the tissues – the tightness, the burning sensation. Yet when I am at home in the rest of my body, really present and grounded, then my body becomes a finely tuned navigational system that registers what’s going on in my client’s ribs, belly, spine, what have you – even though my hands aren’t on those body parts.  

So there’s an intimate partnership between what my hands are feeling and what the rest of my navigational system is reading about another person’s healing process. Yet as bodyworkers, we usually focus on what our hands are receiving, and we ignore the rest of ourselves in the equation.  

Yes, if we’re skilled we pay attention to body dynamics, proper table height and the like. But I’m speaking to a much deeper level of who we can be as therapists if we have the skills to use all of ourselves in the treatment room – the skills of holding a strong therapeutic presence. See Healing From the Core: Grounding and Healthy Boundaries courses. 

To do this we must cultivate a wider field of focus; one that includes all of ourselves and the rest of the universe. But let’s just start with the rest of the room: the ground beneath your feet, the air you’re breathing. Self-care practices that help you hold a wider, steadier presence are of the utmost importance here. When you feel nourished and energetically full, this wider perspective is much easier to achieve.  

Another thought also struck me. By being grounded and steady, it’s far easier for me to receive whatever information is coming through my intuitive channels (what we call the non-conscious in SER) without being upset by it.  

Let’s face it, the images that come into our awareness during a therapeutic session can be surprising at times. Life happens, and it can sometimes show up on the treatment table. But when I’m grounded and steady, what’s troubling to the heart under my hands that day may touch me, but it won’t bring me down. Instead I can simply hold space for my client to heal – to help her heart soften and widen, her chest fill and her body relax. 

So tell me, how do you connect with your clients in a way that enables you to receive this much data without having to walk away with their emotional baggage – their “stuff”? And how do you keep your own issues from polluting your clients’ systems if you’re having a bad day/week/month/life? 

I’d love to hear from you.