For every male therapist I’ve spoken to who is crying the blues for his lack of success, I’ve met another male therapist who is thriving. In my own experience, I realized that as long as I went after the nurturing, comfort massage client, I would have a hard time building my business. So I specialized in pain relief. I trained extensively with John F. Barnes and gained expertise in myofascial release. I adopted a tagline, “Therapeutic Massage for Pain Releif.” My office looks more like a clinic than a spa. I built a very successful massage practice.

The most important thing I realized was that my business’ success had very little to do with how I appeared, and everything to do with what I believed about myself. Once I found my niche, it was easy to ask $100 for an hour of treatment. I never found resistance to my price. Why? Because I believed that my services are worth it. If someone is in pain, then my services become a necessity, not a luxury item.

As long a therapist, male or female, thinks that they are limited in some way, and that this limitation is keeping them from growing, they will not grow. Our success is shaped by what we believe about our success. As long as you see yourself as the effect of outside circumstances, you will be. Once you see yourself as your own cause–that you are the one who shapes your world–then you will be. Victim thinking will always keep you the victim. Victor thinking will do the same: when you see yourself as the victor, then victory is yours!

‘Til next time,

Woody

The path of self mastery is the path of exposing these lies, and at the same time, discovering the Truth about ourselves. The Truth is that we are perfect and only believe that we are not. The Truth is that there are no failures, only opportunities. The Truth is that we WILL accomplish anything we believe we can. If we believe we will accomplish failure, we do. If we believe that we will accomplish success, we will.

So self-mastery is the path of choices. We choose what to believe. We choose to persist at a worthy goal. We choose to set the worthy goal. There is no more worthy goal than Self-Mastery. This goal is made up of three parts:
1.     Understanding and taking joy in believing that each of us has a unique gift to offer the world and that we are able to present that gift when we are our truly authentic selves.
2. Discovering (which is really remembering) what that truly authentic self is.
3. Sharing who we are with the world.

When we live believing the lies that tell us that we are not good enough, smart enough, or any other message that tells us we are undeserving, then our lives are spent trying to attain something from outside ourselves, that only we have the power to give to ourselves. We are born worthy. Being unworthy is a self-defeating belief, but not the Truth. Shedding those limiting and self-defeating beliefs is part of the journey to self-mastery, because until we do, we are not our truly authentic selves.

What would happen to your practice if you embraced the path to self-mastery? What would be your clients’ experience if you shed the lies that blind you to your higher self?

‘Til next time,

Woody

How can that be? When we are motivated in our business to avoid failure, our thoughts move us toward the very thing we don’t want. In fact, anytime we focus on what we don’t want, we are moving toward that very thing. For those who have seen “The Secret,” or have been exposed to the Law of Attraction in one way or another, you have heard, “We become what we think about most of the time”. If you think about the disaster you wish to avoid, what happens? You imagine the disaster. You can see it clearly. You don’t want this to happen, or that to happen–but you can clearly imagine both ‘this’ and ‘that’. Our imagination is a creative force. In fact, imagination is THE creative force. Nothing anyone has ever made was created, and THEN imagined. Imagination is always the first creation.

This being the case, we can use worry as our teacher. We all know what it feels like. We all know how to do it. What if we “worry” about the things we DO want to happen. If we imagine what we DO want with the same effort and clarity that we put into worry, we will have the same result: that which we think about, we will bring about.

Since the other motivator is moving towards something, isn’t it time we start focusing on what we want to move toward, and not that which we wish to avoid?

’til next time,

Woody

When we think that our lack of confidence can be cured by more training, or anything else outside of ourselves, we are not on the right track. One can have hundreds of hours of continuing education, and still not be confident. In fact, thinking that it is a lack of training is putting one into the realm of dangerous thinking. Why dangerous? Because it is saying that growth is how we overcome lack. As long as the focus is on lack, there will always be lack. How much training is enough to overcome feelings of inadequacy?

What really is going on here is that inner voice that says, “I’m got good enough”. I call this voice the gremlin. We all have it, and to each of us, the message is that we are inadequate because of some intrinsic lack.

Training and experience will give you more proficiency. but they won’t instill confidence. Confidence is a function of our beliefs. We have to believe that we are good enough, smart enough, capable enough. When we believe that we are worth $80 a massage, we are then worth $80 a massage. If we ask for our fee like we’re asking permission to charge for what we do, this lack of confidence will cripple our practice.

Imagine two therapists. One is not very good, but is very confident; the other has phenomenal hands and a brilliant intuitive touch, but lacks confidence. If a prospective client has to decide between the two of them based on only a conversation, who is going to get the appointment? This is why confidence is essential–it is a critical factor that determines your future success.

If you lack confidence, it is important to learn what is blocking you. You have some limiting beliefs. “I lack training” is a limiting belief. “I’ll never be good at marketing” is a limiting belief. Neither of these are true unless you believe them to be true. Henry Ford said, “If you think you can or think you cannot, in either case you are correct”.

Where does confidence come from? Within. It is a choice. It is a belief. What will it take for you to believe in yourself?

’til next time,

Woody

So much of what we expose ourselves to on TV teaches us about a violent world, a world that we are helpless to change. It teaches us that we are victims of the economy, of nature, of society. This message is learned subconsciously. This is what we bring with us into the treatment room.

This can be easily remedied. What do you want to learn? Do you want to learn about the power you have to build the practice of your dreams? Do you want to learn how your thoughts shape your environment? Do you want to learn how change your life? All you have to do is choose different teachers.

Among my teachers are Brian Tracy, Eckhart Tolle, Stephen Covey, Zig Ziglar, the teachers in “The Secret”, Napoleon Hill and many more. I limit how much news I watch, read or listen to. I limit how much TV I watch. I expose myself to those teachings that tell me that I can grow, I can achieve, and I can become. I recognize that my success in life begins with my thoughts, so I immerse myself in those teachings that help me change my thoughts.

I invite you to comment on this post and share who your teachers are. Who has influenced you? What have you learned from them? I am very interested in what you have to say.

’til next time,

Woody

Also, my philosophy of growth might be a little different from what you’ve been exposed to. In nature, growth is not just about having physical needs met, it is about propagation. The oak tree not only nourishes itself, but retains enough nourishment to produce acorns, which will hopefully become full grown trees. But when we grow our businesses, our thoughts are usually on just paying our bills and maybe having enough to live on.

It is time we think about growth in a different light. True growth is not about meeting our needs only, but about being able to meet the needs of others, and as many others as possible. Have you ever considered growing to the point that you are expanding the number of people you serve? Well, we all have a limit to the number of sessions we can do. But there is no limit to how many people we can train, that we can mentor. This is growth through reproduction.

Some of the most successful practices are run just this way. Everyone wins. The client is getting the highest standard of service. The new therapist is learning mastery through mentorship. The practice owner is earning a much higher than average income without becoming burnt out.

What is it that needs to change within us for this change to occur? Our thoughts. All growth starts with how we think. All growth starts from within. We all grow from the inside out.